Flip Your Focus

If you are a woman, if you are a mom, if you are a caregiver, I'd hazard a guess that most of the time your focus is directed outward. Toward your husband, your children, your students, your patients, your clients, your friends, your neighbors, your co-workers. This is natural for women. We tend to care a lot about relationships and keeping the people we love happy. This is not a problem. Unless we reserve nothing for ourselves.

When was the last time you asked YOURSELF "How am I?" I'm sure this sounds weird. But you check in with your loved ones regularly. You want to know how they are feeling. So you ask. And it is probably pretty rare that you do the same for yourself.

So take a moment right now. Flip your focus and look inward. Closing your eyes can help bring your attention inward. And just notice what you find. Notice how you are feeling today. How is your physical body? Do you notice places that feel sore, stiff, achy, tense, or tender? Are you aware of any places in your body that feel GREAT today? Notice your mind. Are your thoughts racing? Does your mind feel full? Or quiet and centered? How are your emotions today? Do you feel happy, content, depressed, anxious, angry, frustrated? Just notice the feelings without trying to judge them. Attempt not to label with "good" or "bad" but simply feel and notice. There is no need to try and change or "fix" anything you are feeling. See if you can just sit and be present with everything that you feel.

When you have taken a little bit of time to check in with yourself, simply open your eyes and breathe.

I am guessing this exercise might seem strange to you. Possibly even a waste of your precious time. But I strongly believe it is just as important to check in with yourself as it is to lovingly notice how your friends and family are feeling. If your life is filled with others who are constantly caring in this way for you, then you are extremely fortunate. It is also possible that YOU are the only one who is going to take the time to find out how you are doing today. And if that is the case, your own attention is even more vital. For your health and well-being.

There is no need to stop being the natural caretaker that you are. This is one of our greatest strengths as women. We should continue to care deeply for those in our lives, but at the same time, on occasion, remember to flip your focus. Slow down. Breathe. And ask yourself, "How am I?" I hope today the answer is "AWESOME!"